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Stop Trying to Help; You’re Killing Me

A couple of nights ago I was in a head-on collisi

on. (For those of you who want to feign being concerned, no, I escaped relatively unscathed.)

To spare you all the details, here’s what happened. I was driving on a five-lane road (two in each direction with a turning lane in the middle.) The through traffic going in my direction stopped to allow a guy in a pickup truck to pull out of the parking lot, across traffic. A heartwarming gesture.

Unfortunately, no one told me that’s what they were doing. As I merged into the turning lane, I was suddenly confronted with the over-sized grille of a pickup truck.

Now my car will most probably be classified as “totaled.” I have to buy a new car. I have to deal with at least my insurance company – and perhaps his as well. I have to pay a deductible to my insurance company – which may be refundable, but there are no guarantees. I have to secure interim transportation.

And, as of an hour ago, I had to deal with several bottom-feeding, ambulance chasers suggesting to me that I may be able to recoup “damages” if I allow them to refer me to one of their salivating attorneys.

All this fun because someone tried to be “nice.”

I have a friend who was waiting to make a left turn. The car in the outside lane opposite him, decided to be “nice” and waved him on to turn in front of her. Unfortunately, the guy in the curb lane didn’t get the memo. The inevitable collision resulted in two “totaled” cars. The woman who was “nice” and waved him on, left just as she arrived.

Here’s the point: We’re all paying our state legislators a lot of money to write traffic laws. Why don’t you try getting your money’s worth and FOLLOW THOSE LAWS. The hell with being “nice.” If you have the right of way, use it. Don’t try to make up your own laws by being “nice.” That’s how accidents happen.

There’s a time and place for everything. You want to be “nice”? Go volunteer at a soup kitchen and stay off the highway.

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